Acquiescence
by Aelore
Summary: Originally Assertive Hesitancy. Nicholas confesses a few things and Milly helps him through it. Short.


**Was going through some old writings in one of my many notebooks and stumbled across this. This is a piece between Nicholas D. Wolfwood and Milly Thompson. I have a vague memory writing this but it's fuzzy. I don't know what scene this was in (I've only seen the anime, so I'm basing it off of that and not the manga), but when I figure it out I'll add to it. I always thought it was unfair that these two never got a good scene together.**

***update: I've changed my mind about this piece, I wrote it differently than I originally planned because I discovered a few things; this scene is a little cut in from Episode 23 Paradise. The part where Milly and Nicholas are together in the room and she brings him sandwiches is where it starts, if you have watched the episode you should be able to tell where I started and ended. This is pretty short, but I didn't really want to draw it out as long as I thought I did (I'm not very good with inspirational speeches) Of course, feedback and comments are welcome and any mistakes noted.***

His eyes wavered on the coffee, trying to find solutions to unsolvable problems within the dark swirling liquid. He gave up, putting a distressed hand over his face, trying unsuccessfully to block tears of desperate hopelessness.

"Where did I go wrong?" he sobbed, "I've…I've always chosen the right path, haven't I?" He let the coffee cup crash to the ground as he covered his face. Millie sat next to him, pulling him in and holding him close. The fact that she was there, so real and genuine in a crumbling, insincere world comforted him more than words ever could.

He loosened from her grasp, gazing at her for a moment, a hand going to her cheek and stroking softly. He leaned forward and placed his lips over hers, marveling at how she made the pain ebb. Taken aback, she pulled away slightly. He retreated, a small apologetic smile on his face that had a pained edge to it.

"Sorry."

"Don't be, Mr. Priest, you surprised me is all," she assured him.

"You didn't mind?"

She smiled, closing her eyes and tilting her head slightly, "Not in the least, I kinda liked-" she opened her eyes when she was cut off as he kissed her again. She complied eagerly as he asked for more. When his fingers fumbled with her collar she froze, drawing back a little.

"Mr. Priest?"

"That's not my name," he mumbled against her neck.

"Nicholas…" something in her voice made him pull back and look at her.

She was hesitant for the first time since he had met her. Her fingers began to fumble together, playing with her dress.

"I don't know if….." she wouldn't meet his eyes, "it's just you're grieving right now and I don't think doing this will help in the end."

"Why not?" The blunt question made her meet his serious grey eyes.

"You're in a lot of pain right now, Nicholas. You don't know what you're doing. And I can't answer who was right and who was wrong. You were right and so was Mr. Vash, and you were wrong and so was Mr. Vash. But you can't run away from the decision you made though."

"I'm not running away," he answered, looking over her shoulder to stare at nothing, "I'm not. I just, I can't…keep _thinking,_" his voice caught, "it keeps replaying over and over. But it's not just this one incident, Milly," he brought his eyes to hers, "it's all the violence I've ever committed; justified or not.

"What if…..none of my actions were ever warranted? What if all the people I've killed have been innocent? I may have stopped the lives of the guiltless simply because I was following orders and not finding out for myself. If I had taken a little more time, if I had stopped to think about it…" he stopped, biting his lip to stop the anguished words that were falling at their own accord.

Milly watched him, noticing his trembling hands as he pushed one through his hair. She grabbed it and held it tightly.

"You may be many things, Nicholas D. Wolfwood," she said sternly, "but you are not a murderer. You do not shoot for yourself as a source of amusement; you shoot for the community, for the civilians that need someone to protect them because they cannot protect themselves. You save countless lives by sacrificing yourself for your orphans and any unprotected man, woman or child with your cross, executing only those that are truly guilty. In the name of God you go and fulfill your duty. The only cross you should bear is the gratitude of those you have protected."

Nicholas was silent for a moment, staring at their hands. He looked up at her, "you've never said my full name before," he said softly.

"You better get used to it," she informed him, "because it felt nice saying it and I think I'll be doing it a lot more often."

He smiled, "I hope so." He reached up and hugged her tightly to him.

"You smell nice," he commented.

"Please eat the sandwiches."


End file.
